Category Archives: Wellbeing

Relationship Problems ?

Interpersonal relationships between human beings are extremely complex because there is a meeting of different personalities with different value systems, and at some point there is bound to be disagreement or conflict. When we think of the word “relationship” most of us think of our love relationships, with our spouse or partner. But  there are also many other kinds of relationships, your relationship with your employer or coworkers even your relationship with the local storekeeper. No matter what kind of relationship we are talking about, they are always far more complex and subtle than what they appear to be on the surface. At Bamboo online, we deal with clients and customers on a daily basis, all of whom we have relationships with. Likewise, there are relationships between the various staff members that work here at Bamboo. Like most things in life, relationships are subject to ups and downs and the interpersonal skills of the people involved in the relationship will often determine the ability of the relationship to survive.

Relationship difficulties can wreak havoc in ones life if not processed and worked through adequately. Couple seeking relationship therapy can approach marriage counsellors, couples counsellors or a psychologist. One of my Bamboo colleagues who lives in the Cape Town recently approached psychologist Anita Prag based in the southern suburbs of Bergvliet with her concerns about her marital relationship.

Hayley, my colleague and her husband Dieter have been married for over seven years and are blessed with two young children aged three and four years old. Hayley has become increasingly concerned about the lack of communication between her and her husband over the past year. It seems as if their lives are just too full to have any quality to time to share doing the things that they used to love doing together. This is a common problem that married couples face after the initial bliss is over and the responsibilities of parenting take up much of the previous free time. Anita is a skilled Clinical Psychologist in the southern suburbs with a degree in clinical psychology from the University of Stellenbosch. Anita deals with many couples, married and unmarried as well as same sex couples. Relationship difficulties are normal, in fact healthy, it’s they way in which we deal with them that counts. Often couples are just too tired at the end of a working day to engage in the most important thing which is maintaining the quality of their relationship. It is essential that couples make the effort to spend quality time alone with each other regularly. If they don’t, what happens is, small unresolved gripes grow into smouldering unspoken resentments which can be toxic to any relationship. Hayley managed to convince her husband to meet together with her and Dr Prag at her psychologist practice in Bergvliet. It’s not uncommon for men to be reluctant to go for any kind of counselling or therapy, but nonetheless, Dieter agreed to give it a try after reading up Anita’s credentials on her website http://www.anitaprag.co.za/

According to Hayley the session with Anita was extremely valuable and she was actually quite surprised at how Anita was able to engage her husband into the discussion and how he opened up, speaking about his feelings which is something she says he rarely ever does. “Although there are many southern suburbs psychologists listed, I’m really glad we went with her. Anita’s ability to connect with myself and Dieter was astounding and she developed a great rapport with both of is in the first few minutes of our consultation”

Hearing of Hayley’s success with the psychologist she met with really gives me hope. There are so many failed marriages and couples out there that just give up too quickly. I hope our readers are inspired to take a look at their own relationships and consider therapy before letting the relationship fail because of neglect.

Healthy Mind, Sober Living at Cape Retreat

Recovering from alcoholism and substance addiction is not an easy task, especially for those who have been addicted or alcoholics for years on end. Not having access to an alcohol and drug free living environment poses the biggest threat to derailing a person’s recovery process. Sober houses are becoming more and more popular as direct repercussion of the increase in people being treated for alcohol and drug addiction. Sober house facilities are for the most part operated and staffed by people from the mental health, counselling and substance abuse professions. One such establishment is the Scotswood sober living house in Cape Town. A destructive living environment can put an end to the recovery efforts of even the most dedicated individual who is trying to steer clear of drugs and alcohol. Sober houses were first formed in the 1980’s as a means to assist alcoholics looking to make a new start in a safe environments. Sober houses have changed somewhat since the 1980’s with most of them catering for drug addicts as well as alcoholics since substance abuse has grown rapidly in recent years. A sober house is not intended to be a permanent living arrangement for a recovering addict, but more of a stepping stone that gives them the opportunity to solidify their recovery once leaving a rehabilitation centre. Sober Living houses typically offer the following :

  • A safe living environment free of alcohol and drugs
  • Permission to stay for a period of time, provided house rules are followed
  • An in house counsellor available to assist with difficulties
  • Communal eating areas and availability of cooked meals
  • Information about nearby 12 Step meetings such as AA and NA

Developing new friends and companions is an essential component required to support ongoing sobriety and recovery. The sober house model promotes this in allowing those who share the same difficulties to help each other, as opposed to trying to struggle on in their recovery on their own. There is no particular standard or specific model for the sober house concept. They can range from apartment complexes to renovated homes in suburbs. Statistics do show however that the smaller, more intimate environments allow for more trust and intimacy, allowing friendships to grow more easily. These smaller sober houses have proven to deliver better results than the larger apartment complex styled ones. There are relatively few sober houses in Cape town that provide all the necessary components for recovering addict to reconnect with people, develop new friendships, learn to become a responsible and productive member of society once again. Scotswood is a relatively new sober house in Cape Town that does provide everything that a person serious about their recovery process requires. The Scotswood sober house is set in a tranquil environment occupying a renovated farmhouse. The home is peaceful and is well run with capable staff on site to keep a caring eye on the residents. Anybody looking for a sober house in Cape Town should click here to go to the Scotswood website and discover all the amenities they have to offer. Although it was fairly recently opened, Scotswood has rapidly developed a reputation for being one of the best sober living houses in Cape Town.